Thanks for joining us again on When The Internet Attacks! If you aren't familiar with our show, these emails are all real, found during my day-to-day duties at Rogue Amoeba. I cull the best (worst) of the bunch to mock for your amusement and my sanity. As always, names have been changed to protect the guilty, but spelling and grammar mistakes have been left to preserve the comedy. We've got a big show today, with a full five emails to share, so let's get to it.

First up is Star Wars Steve. Steve and I were have a discussion about adding a possible feature to one of our products, and I indicated that it might be added in the future, but we would make no promises (as per our policy of "Under Promise, Over Deliver").

that kind of shit does not fly with yoda

do you want to piss off yoda?

My response indicated that sadly and to the best of my knowledge, Yoda was quite dead, because really, what do you say to that? Steve's swift reply was as follows

Obviously you guys are totally clueless!!!

Sadness is but a shadow of jealousy is but a shadow of the dark side.

Yoda has gone to another world merely. Didn't you see him doing the two-step in the Ewok village at the end? That fools knows how to dance.

At least some of users have a sense of humor, such as it were. Others, such as our friend Carl take things a bit too seriously, and may need to take, as the kids say, a "chill pill".

Date: June 6th, 2005, 5:56 PM Eastern
Will RA products still be available after the 10.5/Intel transitions?

(Is RA still committed to the Mac despite the change of what's in the box?)

Now, the important thing to note here is that date on this email. On June 6th, at about 1 pm Eastern, Apple announced that they would be switching processors, from IBM/Freescale's PowerPC chips to Intel's x86 chips. This will be a big change, but it won't affect users much - Macs will still run OS X. Anyhow, within just 5 hours, we had our first email from a breathless user, terrified that we wouldn't be supporting our products any more. I can't concieve of the mindset here, but I suppose we should be flattered that he was so worried about our products. Still, people - relax.

Our final text email comes from Linux-Lovin' Larry, asking about Airfoil. Airfoil lets users send any audio to Apple's AirPort Express. So naturely, the following question came up:

Would it be possible to work out some sort of deal so I can get this running in the maemo arena.

www.maemo.org

What about a port for Nokia 770. The device is Linux open source.

I wanna run my tunes through say someing like gs_streamer to the airport express.

Larry

Now, I respect the open source software movement, but we're a business. We're not going to spend porting our software to Linux, and in particular not to a currently-unpopular Nokia internet tablet. The desire for this makes perfect sense, and I suppose if you don't ask, you'll never know. But come on now...

Now, we've got something new here - visual emails. The following two images came via email. The first had this simple explanation:

Here is the PO [Purchase Order] for another purchase

To be certain, we don't sell any hardware, and we sure as hell don't sell an $1800 device. I never got a response as to what the confusion here was, so it's possible "Turner Studios" is still waiting to receive their hardware.

Last up is a simple brain fart. A user emailed to explain that his code wasn't being accepted. I sent our form response, explaining that the name and code needs to be entered exactly as sent. The response was as follows (image edited to protect the absent-minded):

I entered the code exactly as per the email, I even tried Cut and Paste, it still does not work. Screenshot atatched.

Fantastic, no? That's all for now, but be sure to join us next time on When The Internet Attacks!