Today on When The Internet Attacks!, a heartwarming tale just in time for the holiday. And by holiday, I mean of course, Boxing Day. Hello, my Canadian brothers! I don't know what your crazy holiday is all about, but I support you and your socialized healthcare and cheap prescription drugs. Also, hockey is pretty cool, though since the NHL strike I just can't bring myself to care. I think I miss Dominek Hasek, he was crazy between the pipes. But now I'm getting off track. What we're here to focus on is Boxing Day! I mean, When The Internet Attacks! So without further ado, let me present the turnaround tale of Marcus, sure to put you in the Boxing Day mood. Maybe. Like I said, I don't know much about Boxing Day.

Marcus's first three emails came in rapid succession, over the course of four hours, before we could reply to any of them.

Email #1
Mac OS X 10.3.9
Explorer 5
Netscape 7.2
100G free

Downloaded Audio Highjack 2.2.2 easily.

Paid for Audio Highjack Pro.

All download attempts (inc. Mirrors) failed.

Marcus

Email #2

Further to my email earlier today in which I informed you that:

I'm on Mac OS X 10.3.9
Explorer 5
Netscape 7.2
100G free

Downloaded Audio Highjack 2.2.2 easily.

Paid for Audio Highjack Pro.

All download attempts to register Audio Highjack Pro.(inc. Mirrors) failed.

Paid for Audio Highjack 2.2.2 to get registration.

Cut-and pasted registration number. Failed.

Total paid: £10.93 + £21.85 = £32.78

I no longer wish to own either of these products.

I would like a refund, please, and confirmation of refund sent to the above e-mail address.

Thank you.
Marcus

Email #3
Further to my email earlier today in which I informed you that:

I'm on Mac OS X 10.3.9
Explorer 5
Netscape 7.2
Firefox 1.0.5

100G free

Downloaded Audio Highjack 2.2.2 easily.
Paid for Audio Highjack 2.2.2 to get registration.
Cut-and pasted registration number. Failed.

You sent me what appears to be a new reg. no. This was successful. I no longer require a refund on this product.

Paid for Audio Highjack Pro.
All download attempts to register Audio Highjack Pro. On three services (inc. Mirrors) failed.
Total paid: £21.85

I no longer wish to own the Audio Highjack Pro. product.

I would like a refund, please, and confirmation of refund sent to the above e-mail address.

Thank you.

Marcus

Clearly, there's some frustration here, and that's understandable. But we hadn't sent a new code - he purchased two different products. As well, our servers were working just fine, so I sent the following reply.

Email #4
Marcus,
What exactly is occurring when you attempt to download Audio Hijack Pro? What error are you getting? How about if you go to this exact link:

http://www.rogueamoeba.com/audiohijackpro/download/AudioHijackPro.dmg

I'm afraid no refund will be issued here - there's no issue with Audio Hijack Pro, and you received what you paid for - a code to Audio Hijack Pro. We'll try to figure out what's going wrong with the download, but the servers are working just fine and downloads are flowing out.

-Paul

--
Rogue Amoeba Software Support
support@rogueamoeba.com

The following reply came back from Marcus a bit later.

Email #5
Don't worry, I've thrown it all away. I won't bother you again.
Marcus

Well, that was just foolish, and I said as much in the penultimate email, as seen below. On a sidenote, there's got to be a better word for mildly dumb behavior than "silly".

Email #6
Marcus,
Well, that just seems silly. But if you change you're mind, we're always here to help with any questions you have.

-Paul

So there we were, with a frustrated and angry customer that we'd not yet been able to help. Marcus seemed uninterested in being helped, or in dealing with us at all, for reasons unknown. Would Marcus remain angry and mulish? Were we destined to forever have a dissatisfied customer's money, which is worth just as much as any other money but just doesn't feel right? You'll find out when we come back.

And we're back! Now on to the conclusion of this amazing tale, with email number seven!

Email #7
You know something? You're right.

In fact, I can't download ANYTHING now.

But my wife's Mac can. So she got the program. Then she sent it to me, and I found the reg. no. on a scrap of paper and so now I have what I paid for: your program Pro (registered).

The fault is in my computer.

I was angry because some financial newsletters for which I paid a great deal of money for treated me snotty when I asked for simple help on their website -- three times. You may not believe it, but I was very polite. I will not be -- tomorrow.

So I figured the everyone in the US (I live in the UK) finally went down the pan and it's brute force or nothing.

You are one of the few exceptions, and I have to admit I not only admire your composure in the face of my anger, but I have to apologise for the way I acted. Can't claim the moral high ground if you behave like the chimps on Fox News and their ilk.

You were cool; I was not; that's the way it was.

I'll try to learn from your example, but I doubt I'll succeed.

Regards,
Marcus

Oh what a poignant tale of frustration, anger and redemption! It makes me misty every time I get to that conclusion. Just when things seemed irredeemable, a last-minute change of heart saved the day. Merry Boxing Day, you old Building and Loan!

That's it for this holiday edition of WTIA!. We hope your Boxing Day is full of boxes. Or pugilist matches. Or evergreen shrubs with opposite entire leaves and capsular fruits, often used for topiary figures. Join us next time on When The Internet Attacks!, when we might have a clue what the hell Boxing Day is.